Rewind The Tape
(to the tune of Rose Tint My World/Don't Dream It/Wild And Untamed Thing, from Rocky Horror, by Richard O'Brien)
It was great when it all began
I was a regular Roj Blake fan
But it was over when he had the plan
To go to work with a computer man
Now the only reason I switch on
Is to get another look at Avon
Rewind the tape, let me drool over Avon again!
Now the show is four seasons old
And he's beautiful to behold
But somebody should be told
Avon's acting rather out of control
Still, a man who doesn't like to trust
Is the cause of orgasmic lust
Rewind the tape, let me drool over Avon again!
It's a habit
I'm an addict
I can cope - you'll see
Don't take my tapes away!
What's this? - let's see,
I've got - fanzines
Stacked up over me
No - falling down again!
I feel so pleased
Tapes are re-released
My overdraft has increased
Bankruptcy is near
And now my one intention -
To visit a convention
I'll never have a pension
'Cos fandom is so dear
Whatever happened to Avon,
That elegant leather clad frame
As it clung to his thigh
How I started to sigh
'Cos I wanted to cling on
Just the same
Give yourself over
To absolute leather
Turn the hot pages
Of zines full of slash
Erotic nightmares
Beyond any measure
And silver stud daydreams
To treasure forever
Can't you just see it
Whoah - Oh!
Don't dream it - wear it
Don't dream it - wear it
I've got to get out of this place
Before the dealers room
Drains my purse
I've got to be strong
And try to hang on
Or my mind may well snap
And my cash will be spent
On more zines!
It's beyond me
There's life PGP
God bless Terry Nation!
Buy buy buy!
Buy buy buy buy buy!
Buy buy buy buy!
Buy!
I'm a wild and untamed fan
Got my badge and my hotel plan
Got my costume for the fancy dress
And a list of questions for the guests
So let the room party sounds rock on
Viewing rooms are open till dawn
Rewind the tape, let me drool over Avon again!
We're the wild and untamed fans
Got the trivia quiz well in hand
Everything has run to time - so far
Now let's go see Gareth in the bar
Queued for hours for an autograph
Now we're broke, but we've had a laugh
Rewind the tape, let us drool over Avon again!
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