Lyekka

(to the tune of Lola, by The Kinks)

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I met her in a dream once in outer space
And when I woke up, she was there, my cosmic hitchhiker
A cosmic hitchhiker

She walked up to me and she stood by my bed
I gave her the name of a girl that I'd once met called Lyekka
Ly ly ly Lyekka

Well I'm not a real keen gardening guy
But when she squeezed me tight, I swear I saw green fly
On my Lyekka, ly ly ly Lyekka

Well I'm not dumb but I can't understand
Why she looks like a girl but she's smooth round the bend
Oh my Lyekka, ly ly ly Lyekka

Well I thought she was cute to have onboard
Until she ate those astronauts
She ate them up from right inside their dreams
They may have died happy, but I still heard screams

Well I'm not the world's most muscle bound hunk
But at least it meant that I wasn't lunch
For my Lyekka, ly ly ly Lyekka, ly ly ly Lyekka

She gobbled two up, and wanted one more
Boots fell to the floor. I felt weak at the knees
I looked at her - please don't eat me!

Well I hate to say but I think it's odd
The way that she lives in a vegetable pod
Oh my Lyekka, ly ly ly Lyekka

Girls will be bad, and boys will be food
It's a tricky decision, what to do
About Lyekka, ly ly ly Lyekka, ly ly ly Lyekka

Well I hadn't had sex for about eight years
But I still knew something wasn't right here
Wanted to run when she touched my head
She said "Captain Stan, gonna make you a Xev"

Well I'm not the most intelligent man
But I know what she is, and my girl is a plant
Like a ficus, ly ly ly Lyekka, ly ly ly Lyekka

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